Dogs of Orninica by Daniel Unedo

Author:Daniel Unedo [Unedo, Daniel]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
ISBN: 123456789X
Published: 2014-02-07T16:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

General

THIS HIGHLY CLASSIFIED COMMUNICATION IS FOR THE RECEPIENT'S EYES ONLY, YOU ARE KINDLY INSTRUCTED TO DESTROY IMMEDIATELY AFTER READING.

Esteemed gentle-dogs, you are the captains of industry. The most important and well-bred noble-dogs in the world. I'm sure you've all heard by now, but just in case any of you are holed up on your sleepy private islands incommunicado; it's official, we're starting a new war. Glorious, profit-amassing, perpetual war. All of Nureongi is now yours for the plucking.

What we need to decide now is who gets what. We have to split up the natural resources, the land, the new labor force... The nectar is endless and there's much to decide.

Since Mr. Fitz and Mr. Rupulfort provided the impetus for this wonderful war, they will of course receive priority in the division of the spoils. They have right of first refusal for the biggest items on the agenda. But beyond that, we'll need to set up a meeting at the society and decide how to divide everything amongst yourselves.

First on the agenda is obviously the weapons contracts. We're going to need every comically over-sized chaotically destructive weapon you can muster up. If it can obliterate at least five enemy combatants at a time, we'll buy it. We're going to put on quite a fireworks show for the poor simple natives. And please, don't worry about safety testing, we're on a tight schedule here.

Once we've blown the hell out of everything, and annihilated their unprofitable hunter-gatherer lifestyle, we'll of course need your companies to quickly move in and open up shop. We're thinking we'll start with the obvious; good old Orninican food, so we'll need fast food franchises ready to go. Once the natives get their first taste of processed industrial food, it'll open up a slew of new untapped markets for you to exploit. The 'food' will eventually give them all kinds of wonderful cancers and influenzas you can make a killing from.

Of course, there's a lot of work to be done before we reach that stage. These are very backwards creatures, they don't even have a common currency, instead relying on a primitive barter system. So the first thing we'll be establishing is a central bank. Print up some severely devalued money, issue them all with credit cards, show them how to buy microwave dinners and pay the rent, and we're in business. A lot of you will be the shareholders of the Nureongi central bank, with the biggest stakes of course going to Mr. Fitz and Mr. Rupulfort.

We'll designate a handful of zones for cities, and push the natives towards them from all directions. Can't have them all spread out Willy-nilly if we're going to make proper use of them as a cheap labor supply. Once we've broken their backwards nomadic habits, we'll need construction to begin. Resorts, bars, factories, power stations, corporate farming operations, mines, oil wells, brothels, waste disposal... Some living quarters for the workforce of course, and roads to get them from the slums to their new places of work.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.